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Gossipgirl
HEY PEOPLE！
SOME RECENT OBSERVATIONS
THE CASTAWAYS
I honestly don't know what's gotten into a certain group of people lately。 I mean is it okay to just；
like； disappear？？ Apparently a bunch of boys we all know and love （at least most of the time） have
hijacked a very large； well…appointed sailboat and are headed into the Atlantic。 It could be just
another senior prank； except that half the boys on the boat are juniors。 It's kind of random time to
take off； especially when all of us girls could use a little entertainment。 Just who do they think
they are… Christopher Colombus？
YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST
They have their choice of guys； but for whatever reason； models can't get enough of guys with
guitars。 Rumor has it the latest couple of the moment is a certain blond…haired Fifth
Avenue…dwelling senior girl and the lead guitarist from the Raves。 How； when； and where they
met is a plete mystery； but talk about a perfect couple！
TO GAP OR NOT TO GAP？
Don't even try to pretend it was someone else： I saw you sneaking into the Gap on Eighty…sixth
and Madison and actually trying on a plum…colored Juicy Couture terrycloth zip…up hoodie in the
kids' section。 Okay； I'm a snooping bitch。 But the reason I'm ratting you out is I tried the very same
hoodie on； and； unlike you （although I know you wanted to）； I bought three of them！ Why not？
They're cute； and we're going to need lots of terrycloth cover…ups to wear après le pool this
summer。 Plus we'll probably spill Campari or crème de menthe or something equally devastating
all over ourselves； so we'll need more than one。 Besides； terrycloth is terrycloth； and what better
way to show off your white new jacquard Gucci bikini than with a cute plum…colored hoodie？
Think of it as a get…out…of…jail…free card： you're still not allowed to buy jeans there … heaven forbid…
but you can now have my permission to purchase certain necessary items at the Gap。
YOUR E…MAIL
Q： Dear GG；
Are you ever going to tell us where you're going to college next year？ Have you even decided？
…qrs
A： Dear qrs；
That's for me to know and you to find out。 But let me ask you this… do I strike you as the
indecisive type？
…GG
Q： Dear GG；
I heard Damian Polk from the Raves used to live in the same building as that blond model you're
always talking about。 They've known each other since they were babies and they used to hook up
in the elevator in the middle of the night； while the =doorman was napping。
…ob…v…us
A： Dear ob…v…us；
That's a great story； but I heard Damian's family lived in Ireland until he was thirteen。 Hence his
funny accent and the reason why he's always seems a little drunk。
…GG
Q： Dear GG；
I run the crew on a sailboat that belongs to a prominent New York family。 The son； who I hear has
been in lots of trouble before； took off in the sailboat yesterday evening and hasn't returned。 I'm
afraid his ass will be grass whenever he gets back； because his dad is kind of tough。
…captain
A： Dear captain；
His ass is already grass； for more reasons than that！
…GG
SIGHTINGS
S and an unidentified blond hunk… possibly her brother or possibly that guitarist from the Raves… at
the Central Park Zoo； feeding left…over sushi from lunch at Nicole's to the sea lions。 B buying two
La Perla nighties at Barneys。 She seems to have developed an addiction to lingerie； but what else
can one wear while lounging alone in a Plaza Hotel suite； waiting for one's boyfriend to turn up。 D
at Yellow Rat Bastard on lower Broadway； trying on every hat in the store。 V purchasing a new lip
ring … ew！ … at a piercing place in Williamsburg。 J in Barneys Co…op trying on every pair of Seven
Jeans in the store ignoring the salesperson's suggestion that she'd have better luck finding jeans
that fit in Bloomingdale's children's department。 K and I at Jackson Hole again； scheming again。
N… not。 Where in the hell is N anyway？
Don't worry I'll find him。
You know you love me；
Gossip Girl
MODELS WHO DATE ROCK STARS
〃How e no matter what I wear I always look like a cartoon character〃 Jenny plained to her
friend and Constance Billard School classmate Elise Wells。 It was Saturday night and they were
getting ready for Dan's gig with the Raves at Funkiton； a new music venue in revamped fire
station on Orchard Street。 Jenny glanced at Elise。 〃And you always look so normal。〃
The two girls regarded their reflection in the full…length mirror on the back of Jenny's closet door。
Jenny was wearing a stretchy red top with cap sleeves and a plunging U…shaped neckline that
made her breast look gargantuan。 She was barely five feet tall； and her very first pair of seven
jeans had always been too long for her when she bought them at Bloomingdale's； so she had the
lady at the dry cleaner's on Broadway and Ninety…eighth shorten them about ten inches。 Now she
noticed that the purposely 〃antiqued〃 spot on each leg where her knee was supposed to be fell at
mid…shin。 The only acceptable part of Jenny's body was her head。 She liked her big； far…apart
brown eyes； her clear whiter skin； her red lips； and her curly brown hair with its straight； severe
nags across the forehead。 As Serena once told her； she looked like a Prada model… with oversized
breast implants and stumps for legs； although Serena would never have said that part。
Elise's body was totally the opposite。 She was seven inches taller than Jenny； with long skinny
legs； long skinny arms； and a flat chest。 Nothing was ever too tight on her； except maybe in the
belly region； which had sort of a doughnut roll around it。 But that was easily hidden beneath a
shirt。 There was really nothing Jenny could do to hide her chest。 Then again； Elise was covered in
Freckles… there were even freckles on her eyelids… she had chin length straw…yellow hair that was
so thick and so coarse； she could barely fit it into a rubber band。
Well nobody's perfect。 Except for maybe a very select few of us。
〃Let's trade tops；〃 Elise suggested。 She pulled off her black V…neck T…shirt and handed it to Jenny。
〃Okay；〃 Jenny responded dubiously； and pulled off her red one。 Elise's shirt was from Express； and
hers was from Anthropologie； which was slightly nicer； but Jenny didn't want to hurt Elise's
feelings by saying anything。 Besides the results were astronomical。 Jenny's chest looked almost
modest in the black top； and the red top made Elise's hair gleam with strawberry highlights neither
of them had ever known she had。
〃I bet Serena van der Woodsen doesn't even look at herself before she goes out；〃 Jenny declared。
She dropped down on her knees and started crawling around the room。 〃She probably doesn't even
have to try stuff on； except for maybe shoes。〃
Elise put her hands on her hips。 〃What are you doing？〃
〃Wearing in the knees on my jeans；〃 Jenny replied； still crawling。 〃Did you hear about Serena and
Damian from the Raves？〃
Elise nodded。 Everyone had heard。
Jenny crawled across the matted pink carpet to her closet to select a pair of shoes。 Of course；
Serena never had to crawl around like a dog in an attempt to make her jeans look normal。 〃I don't
know how she does it。〃 She pulled her new Michael Kors gold toe…ring sandals and slid them on。
Her dad said the sandals looked like something a belly dancer would wear； but she'd gotten them
for free at the W photo shoot； and they were the nicest pair of shoes she owned。
How strange that she'd had that little moment of superstardom… that photo shoot with Serena… and
now she was back to being plain old her； a fourteen…going…on fifteen…year…old girl with big
ambitions and an even bigger chest。 It wasn't like her life's ambition was to quit school at the age
of fourteen and bee a super model； but it would have been kind of nice if someone asked her
to。
Jenny stood up and brushed off the knees of her jeans。 They were pletely； disappointedly
unfaded and； except for the wonky placement of the distressed part of the denim； pletely
uninteresting…just like everything else in her closet。 Serena's clothes were always so perfectly
frayed； fade